for all the things i did
for all the decisions i made
i never had regrets

till today

i regret when after receiving the call
telling me to go home early after training
that he might not make it through the night
and i stupidly did

i went home after training

and it was the first time i left early during training
but i guess i wasn't early enough

i decided to get a cab home
as usual
they would drive past even though they are not hired
as usual
i had to wave madly to flag one down

why didn't he wait for me?
i was less than five minutes away

got the call and a voice muttered,
he's gone

tears became uncontrollable
everything seemed to have slowed down
i missed him

when the cab stopped outside my house
i couldn't feel my legs

run, i told myself but nothing
only managed to go faster when i was rushing to the room

tears came silently
and i asked myself,
why didn't i come home straight after the call?

i learnt alot today
some things just can't wait
singapore cabs suck even more
instant noodles go down easy when you're upset

anyway,

thanks for spoiling me when i was small
with cartoons, sweets, outings
thanks for teaching me tactics
in chinese chess, tic tac toe
thanks for sharing stories
of your love story, war, my parents
thanks for the concern
about my studies, health, relationship, tabletennis
thanks for just flashing
that big wide smile before i saw you bedridden

i'm so sorry i couldn't reach home in time
爷爷，我好想你

♥ 1:54 AM