i remember around this time last year that some unfortunate incident had happened. sigh. i hope this does not turn out to be an annual thing.

a major screw up yesterday taught me to never be the one trying to explain your side of the story so frantically. best case scenario, not being paid attention to or worst case, completely misunderstood. so i learnt, never try too hard cause when you fail you get hit in the face the hardest. because of so many incidents, i could've just run myself against the wall. so please slap me if i do, at least it doesn't hurt as much.

and i don't understand why people like to make me feel like i'm a loser or something. even my boyfriend does it to me sometimes. well, at least the times when he apologises and makes me laugh and everything makes up to it. with him, i don't mind being a loser as long as i'm a loved loser. haha. God loves loser too! bleh, i'm being too optimistic about this.

on the topic about boyfriends, i remember talking to fion a few times like how we sort of became "friendless" after getting attached. it's like we keep hanging out with our other half and even if there were friends involved, mostly it's friends from his side. somehow, boyfriends and girlfriends don't mix. i know mine tried, but somehow it doesn't really work out. think it's all about the possessiveness. i thought about it after talking to fion when we say like when our boyfriends are free but we chose to hang with someone else. guys who try to be nice will say it's ok, you go enjoy yourself. but in the end, they'll just complain to you about how bored and poor thing they are and you'll end up feeling guilty and go find that boy. lol. for some that are not so nice, they'll just say it out loud and make you feel like you just made the worst decision in your life. haha. like i said, possessiveness. since you're MY girlfriend, and since MY time is available, you should be by MY side cause you're MY girlfriend. ): what else to say? ok lor, sulks. haha.

well whatever the case, friends or boyfriend? one has to be sacrificed i guess. my decision would be to sacrifice friends. i just think that the scenario won't be as bad. i mean, all in all you may end up losing some people, but it just goes to show that the friendship was just rocky in the first place. still, i think friends will definitely understand better than boyfriends about the situation anyway. thus result in the fly kite syndrome.

so after digressing so long, maybe the start of the year ain't my thang. well, but it's not really that bad i guess. it's also around this time last year that i met him! so happy. haha. i still remember every single detail of the awkwardness, the pretending-i-didn't-talk-to-you-online-last-night. haha. really comical. even walking past me without looking at me once! hmph. do you know how annoyed i was? lol. and oh! it means we're going to reach our one year soon! haha. so exciting.

alright, i got to get back to work! loads of stuff to do today.



-LeeUuZ

♥ 9:52 AM