they say when you sleep during the wrong time of the day, you'll get bad dreams. boy did i have a helluva evening. -.-

basically, i very very exhausted this whole week for no reason at all. i used to sleep at 2am and wake at 6.30am with no problem at all. now, i just can't seem to stay awake during work. and what makes it worse is that i slept at 12am, which really gives me no reason to be tired at all. ):

so yea, this evening i had the worse dreams. yes, dreamS. one after another. think i had like four to six of them consecutively between 5-7pm. and i was wasted and just lay there till 8pm before having my dinner. man, this is so stressful. and if you're wondering what are the dreams about, i had one that i was some kind of ninja archer. hmm. well, the main point of the dreams is about me being hunted down to be killed. ): of course i was trying to escape. i thought that the ninja archer thingy was quite cool cause the arrows were silvery white and very very thin. sadly, i still didn't like the idea of being hunted down to be killed. and now, i'm having headaches due to exhaustion.

i sort of think that this is some kind of mental thing. i know my body well and i know it's not so "fragile". but when it concerns the mind, sometimes it just gets worse like ten times over. mental exhaustion sucks. i think i've mentioned in my past posts that i love the feeling of physical tiredness. cause at least i know that my muscles have been working and it's very satisfactory. and the way your body just relaxes after the whole workout is the best feeling i can get. haha. LL told me that the best feeling in the world is when nature calls, and you finally find a toilet to relief yourself. hahahaha! well, it's true. (x

sigh, i wish sleep can heal but it doesn't. and after the evening thing, i don't think i want to sleep anytime soon.

anyway, today i went to MOE to select my poly courses. thanks hoi for accompanying me. OH! GIRLS AH~! let me tell you, hoi is single and available! see he so nice accompany me to buona vista you know? very far. somemore we're just friends! isn't he just nice? anyone interested feel free to ask me for more details or just go his blog through my links if you can find him. hahaha! (x erm, digressed. so i went to MOE and we saw two stupid signs pointing towards the customer service counter. apparently, printed signs are 2D thus point left means left, point right means right, point up means straight, point diagonal left/right means up left/right. thus! they can't indicate for you to cut through the rectangular empty space in the middle diagonally. instead, they place two signs for people to go perpendicularly which is a longer route that i stupidly almost followed. haha. OH! i did another stupid thing today, i brought my PAE result slip instead of JAE! haha. so funny. and i didn't bring my CCA certificate. ): and the person told me if i do not have prove for my CCA points, they'll just count it as F9. boo. and i very very zhai-ly told her it's ok since my CCA points only minus one point. hahaha. anyway, turns out my PAE result slip came in handy cause it shows my CCA score! and CCA points does not change thus woots! haha. i'm so smart sometimes. (x

after the MOE thing, hoi went home to prepare for umpiring while i went to LL's house. (: he's been preparing for his exams and we hardly spend more than two hours together. most of the time, it was just a meal and i'd go home. plus, his mom have been so strict with us! ): he'll be nagged at and scolded if she found out we met. times spent these days are very precious to me. i almost cried when he held me in his arms today. i'm just being so silly. it's not like we're not meeting at all. guess only those in relationships can understand how i feel. it's always easy to say than do. anyway today was no different. i reached his house around 3pm and i reached home at almost 5pm. see! less than two hours! ):

well, on the lighter note, i went out with fion and candy on thursday after work. went to eat at this ramen store at the basement of fareast. and we just chatted our hearts out. just complain complain, listen listen, gossip gossip. haha. and we realise we're the type of friends that aren't suitable to go shopping with. but we can empathize with each others' situation. at first when i saw fion and candy, i never thought i could clique with them cause we seemed so different. they looked so "lian" while i'm more of the goody goody kind with a very fierce expression. LOL. so glad that we clique so well and they really made my days in starhub. anyway, after dinner, fion and i felt weird and we started having tummy aches. ended up in paragon toilet and we just diarrhea-ed. wonder if it had anything to do with our dinner. and candy waited for us. haha. when fion and i stepped out of the cubicle, both look super exhausted. haha.

went to find LL that night too. he was at STTA watching the above 40s and veteran matches. but when i reach, it was already 10pm and i saw people walking out of STTA. -.- in the end, i went to toa payoh from somerset to get a free ride back to tampines. wow. haha. again, i spent less than two hours with him. ):

i want his exams to faster finish then i can spend more time with him. then again, he told me he'll be working during cny. )': can i say no? but he needs the money. )''':

ok, my headache is getting worse. i'll stop now.



-LeeUuZ

♥ 11:06 PM

just don't feel like sleeping yet. but then again, there's not much to blog about my mundane life.

well, i'm pretty looking forward to poly life, sure will have stuff to blog about then. but for now, i just have to be contented with what i can blog right now. ABSOLUTE BOREDOM, hohoho.

anyway, finally eighteen this year. suddenly it feels as if another door in my life has opened! no more sneaking and faking my way into clubs, m18 shows and when i drink. but then again, would it be as fun as trying to get in underage? depends i guess. privileges to enter clubs now is definitely good cause i hate the thought of being bounced out or being caught during a raid. same for drinking. but m18 shows, hmm. i guess it won't be much of a difference cause i've never been checked. oops, i'm like spouting my adventures with the law. haha.

and i finally found this song called Loving You by Minnie Riperton. if anyone knows it, you'll know that it's often called the Hai Tun Ying, dolphins' call. cause there's this part when the singer goes really really high pitched. haha. but overall, the song's really good. (x

and i found out that i love genres by The Cranberries too! haha. i'm not sure if they're the original artistes of the song Kiss Me but they make a good rendition out of it. (: and i really want their album! anyone kind enough to get me one? hehe.

OH!!!!! SIMPLE PLAN'S ALBUM IS COMING OUT SOON! february i think. man, they've been out of action for such a long time and i really miss hearing pierre over the radio. recently, 98.7fm started playing their hit single When I'm Gone. really really great! haha. please do listen to it. hehe.

sigh, losing the handphone cable really sucks. there's so many pretty pictures i want to upload into my laptop but it's so troublesome to do so! i have to borrow jing's handphone, bluetooth my stuff over, save the files in his phone, then can connect to laptop to upload. sigh.

and i just remembered that, i still can't make up my mind which poly to go. TP or SP? anyone wants to comment on that? i'll appreciate it a lot a lot. ok thanks.
and i'm falling asleep! boo



-LeeUuZ

♥ 2:38 AM

i'm so PISSED OFF early in the morning!? wahlao, really spoils the whole day can?
as usual, i was sleeping in the mrt headed towards CBD. peak hour, a lot of people, DAMN lot of people. and i'm one of those who specially took the train backwards so that i can have seats to sleep cause i'm very very tired. today, i was even more tired that i actually wanted to take leave but i still forced myself to go work.

so whilst in my peaceful sleep, this damn uncle had to go,

"REACH ALREADY."

obviously i woke up. then i saw this uncle staring at me la. at that point, i was like, what the hell? like lavender or something only can? i want to sleep more leh. so i simply ignored that guy and fell back asleep. well, two stops later it was at cityhall already. sian. then i walk out off the train, the same uncle went,

"NO MANNERS."

wahlao, now i really wanted to give him a piece of my mind lor. who does he think he is? what right does he have? oh wait, he looks old, had a walking stick in his hand-OHH!! a slightly disabled SENIOR CITIZEN. now i know. come on la, let's be realistic. early in the morning, either on your way to school or work. who the hell would expect to see a SENIOR CITIZEN in the morning?! !#$%^@&* then, you so tired, want to rest on your journey to work, suddenly this f*ed up asshole wakes you up before you even reach your stop. duh, fall back asleep and ignore that guy. seriously, i won't even bother looking carefully at the person who woke me up can? i was so tired that i just fell back asleep after a glance around me.

ok, point ONE - respect the elderly:
i really do respect them. seriously, if that guy came in the train like noon or something when i'm WIDE AWAKE, i'll give up my seat without a second thought. point is, it wasn't noon nor was i wide awake. and that guy certainly does not deserve my respect.
"no manners"? speak for yourself. for one why do you pick on me? i was sleeping, don't even know you came in. nevermind, the other passengers leh? not awake ah? too bad they look more tough than me otherwise you could approach them like, POLITELY? even if you woke me up POLITELY, i would've just stood up and let you take the seat. sorry hor, you don't deserve my respect and too bad for you, my body stood up for me and just let me fall back asleep. HAHA.

point two - privileges:
i thought the elderly had some special discount like if they take the public transport during non-peak hours? i remember my grandparents telling me that and they MAKE EFFORT to do so. and isn't it better this way? when senior citizens take transport during non-peak hours, doesn't it make sense that THERE WILL BE SEATS? so why the f* isn't he doing the same?

point three - old man early in the morning, AT ORCHARD ROAD:
WHAT THE HELL is a f*ing old guy doing early in the morning at somerset? yes, he alighted the same stop as me. but excuse me, is there anything suitable for an old guy like you EARLY in the morning at ORCHARD ROAD? for all i know, the percentages i've seen senior citizens hanging around orchard road, is inversely proportionate to the ones i've seen at chinatown or bedok. point is, got hospital here meh? got place for you to do your groceries meh? everything here is so expensive. so why are you in orchard road in f*ing 8AM?

the more i thought about it, the more it doesn't make sense. the more i thought, the more i should've really given him a piece of my mind. sadly, i was tired and really hate to look like i'm the bully so i let him off. next time i see him ah, #$%^&*(!!! and reason why he picked on me? i was the youngest in the train. stupid old man. hope your dick rots with maggots all over it and you be buried by your dead skins. pfft.



-LeeUuZ

♥ 8:57 AM

ITS NOT FAIR )':

♥ 11:05 PM

someone comment that my blog was pretty disturbing. don't really understand it. hmm, care to clarify?

anyway, after a week since new year, finally had some nice weekend to look forward to. on friday night during cell, we went to watch a skit by luwei productions at the jubilee hall in raffles hotel. it's called the red connection, an evangelistic skit. i managed to get him along too! hehe, so proud of myself. well, he said i scammed him cause i didn't mention that the skit would be God-related. haha. but i did tell him it was evangelistic what. (x at first, i was so worried that he'd back out last minute. and i was so so afraid he wouldn't enjoy the skit. but really thank God. the skit was splendid, the actors did a marvelous job. for a skit, i think they acted really really good. (: regret that i didn't get other people to go for it. still, i was so relieved to hear him say that the skit was good. haha. after the skit, yunzhen yiting mu isaiah him and me went to chill at tampines starbucks. so glad that he managed to entertain the bunch of them. hehe. hopefully i get more chances like this so that he can get to know the people from DISCus.

after chilling, him and me went to thai disco to chill somemore. didn't want to drink at first but didn't know what other beverages to order. in the end, he decided on a redbull vodka and a cranberry vodka for me. turns out, the bartender knew it was him that ordered so the drink was pretty heavy on the vodka. haha. after our first mouth, both our faces sort of scrunched up like some paper ball. haha. quite hilarious. and we ordered sotong balls and chicken wings! i love the sotong balls. somehow they always managed to cook it in a way that they become so succulent and juicy. yum! as we watched the performance, he bought two flower bands for me to give the singers that we like. haha. i was so SHY! i gave the first band to this female singer who has really really powerful vocals. haha. when she smiled and thanked me for the flower thing, i practically melted. haha. then i wanted to give the other band to this female singer that i so so adore cause she's super pretty and has super nice figure and is super super my-type-of-girl. haha. but sadly, she already finished her last performance and i didn't have the chance to pass it to her. ): well on the brighter side, we decided to give the flower thing to king, he's friend/colleague. but king was quite blur and gave the flower thing back! haha. aiyo, LL then told him he could claim five bucks for it so king quickly went to get it back. LOL!

after thai disco, we decided to go book a hotel room for the night. and we had a heart-to-heart chat about self-confidence and stuff. sharing our lives during primary and secondary school. the heartbreaks and all. (: got to know each other more and understand each other even more deeply. hehe, thank you!

then saturday, i didn't go for service. haha. instead, i finally went on a date with yiting at the SMU weekend sale. haha. could tell she really love it. cause after i finished browsing, she was still looking at the stuff! gosh. but nevermind, it's never good to rush shopping. should always take our time. (x in the end, she bought this cute handmade teddybear with a rabbit hood for ben and this red tube for herself. while i bought this lovely pair of earrings for myself and this cute rabbit thingy that can record voices and playback for LL. (: after shopping we went back to whitesands and got separated there. she went for dinner with her family while i went to find LL and his friend at the arcade. after that, i packed this really delicious meal from burger king called tendergrill to his house. the burger was so so good! i'm like a little craving for it now. chicken was well grilled and marinated. haha. aahh, i'm hungry. lol. then we just chatted and watched tv. fell asleep halfway and i woke around three or four in the morning to go home. realised jing wasn't home yet! so shocked. i thought he was sleeping in my grandparents room since he does that pretty often when they're not around. so morning, he told me i was o.O haha.

so sunday, piano as usual then i went to find LL again. haha. he made iceblended coffee for me again! haha. and he gave some to his bro's gf. she loved it can? haha. TOO BAD! he's mine! (x went to changkat for tabletennis. LL is still coaching private and i helped him today. quite long since i did this kind of thing. after the training, we went for dinner then played tabletennis again. i'm so beat. haha.

yay! that's my weekend! and i have this really great idea for valentines' this year. can't wait to share it tomorrow. haha. anyway, trying to really fulfill my new year resolution. so! i did a hundred crunches just now! haha. sadly, i know it's not a lot cause i used to do more during canoeing trainings when i was still in tpjc. well, it's a start i guess.

ok, i'll go sleep already. what a long post.
eleventh coming!! (x



-LeeUuZ

♥ 12:47 AM

after last night, i know that i've made the best choice in my seventeen years of life. i'm so glad that i have my boyfriend. even after all those crazy fights we had in the past, they turn to nothing. thank God for letting this beautiful person into my life. and even though he's not perfect, i'm glad that he's still gorgeous in his own ways. thank you so much for falling in love with me and bringing me along this journey. when you firmly told me that you'd protect me, you can't imagine how touched i was during that moment. thank you so much for all your love.

now, it's my turn. this is for you and for God. (:



-LeeUuZ

♥ 10:28 PM

i remember around this time last year that some unfortunate incident had happened. sigh. i hope this does not turn out to be an annual thing.

a major screw up yesterday taught me to never be the one trying to explain your side of the story so frantically. best case scenario, not being paid attention to or worst case, completely misunderstood. so i learnt, never try too hard cause when you fail you get hit in the face the hardest. because of so many incidents, i could've just run myself against the wall. so please slap me if i do, at least it doesn't hurt as much.

and i don't understand why people like to make me feel like i'm a loser or something. even my boyfriend does it to me sometimes. well, at least the times when he apologises and makes me laugh and everything makes up to it. with him, i don't mind being a loser as long as i'm a loved loser. haha. God loves loser too! bleh, i'm being too optimistic about this.

on the topic about boyfriends, i remember talking to fion a few times like how we sort of became "friendless" after getting attached. it's like we keep hanging out with our other half and even if there were friends involved, mostly it's friends from his side. somehow, boyfriends and girlfriends don't mix. i know mine tried, but somehow it doesn't really work out. think it's all about the possessiveness. i thought about it after talking to fion when we say like when our boyfriends are free but we chose to hang with someone else. guys who try to be nice will say it's ok, you go enjoy yourself. but in the end, they'll just complain to you about how bored and poor thing they are and you'll end up feeling guilty and go find that boy. lol. for some that are not so nice, they'll just say it out loud and make you feel like you just made the worst decision in your life. haha. like i said, possessiveness. since you're MY girlfriend, and since MY time is available, you should be by MY side cause you're MY girlfriend. ): what else to say? ok lor, sulks. haha.

well whatever the case, friends or boyfriend? one has to be sacrificed i guess. my decision would be to sacrifice friends. i just think that the scenario won't be as bad. i mean, all in all you may end up losing some people, but it just goes to show that the friendship was just rocky in the first place. still, i think friends will definitely understand better than boyfriends about the situation anyway. thus result in the fly kite syndrome.

so after digressing so long, maybe the start of the year ain't my thang. well, but it's not really that bad i guess. it's also around this time last year that i met him! so happy. haha. i still remember every single detail of the awkwardness, the pretending-i-didn't-talk-to-you-online-last-night. haha. really comical. even walking past me without looking at me once! hmph. do you know how annoyed i was? lol. and oh! it means we're going to reach our one year soon! haha. so exciting.

alright, i got to get back to work! loads of stuff to do today.



-LeeUuZ

♥ 9:52 AM

this year, i'll break up my resolutions into three parts.

GOD:
1. rely on Him
2. talk to Him regularly, He loves my voice i know (x
3. listen to Him
4. get at least five friends to church
5. QT where are you????
6. be testimony to friends and family

LIFE:
1. drink less or don't drink at all
2. stay home more
3. go to school regularly (x
4. fight less with boyfriend over stupid stuff
5. be more daring to make new friends
6. be more daring to invite new friends and old friends to hang out together
7. get boyfriend to know more of my friends
8. not to get hooked on clubbing
9. be less easy to be jealous, haha

SELF-IMPROVEMENT:
1. improve on makeup
2. take up dancing classes, HIPHOP AND LATIN HIPHOP HERE I COME
3. abs abs abs abs abs abs abs abs
4. finally train on my tabletennis, lol
5. get tanner, put my new bikini to use (x
6. stop peeling my dry lips, i just did
7. stop scratching/peeling my scabs, i know i'll bleed and leave scars
8. pass grade 8 piano, hurhurhur

so many stuff to do. better get started!



-LeeUuZ

♥ 3:17 PM

i've crossed hurdles after hurdles, but when will they end?

new year eve's ok for me. when to nee's muay thai friend's house. lively bunch. but i guess i'd rather hang out with a bunch of people that i know cause i take pretty long to warm up to new people.

2007, it's gone just like that. and so many things have happened, so many changes. and i have to admit, i've neglected people ever since i got him. it's not a cheery feeling. but i really thank God that friends around me understand and i'm really really grateful for that. sadly, i wish everyone would think the same way but it really doesn't happen that way. ): and of all people, you were the least expected. i know i've let you down countless times in 2007. but you've only been hearing half the story. i wondered if it'd make any difference if you knew the whole thing. but i really want to let you know, you mean a whole lot to me. saying that is so superficial like i'm just trying to appease your disappointment. i want to make up for it but you have to give me time. situations in the past can't be compared to situations now. we've grown up, i'm sure you have noticed. i'm really sincere about this, but can you sense it?

sigh, i really don't know how to handle all these. i've just settled one and now there's another. it never ends till the end of the race. for now, i just have to keep leaping. now i have plenty of ideas for my new year resolution.

Happy 2008.



-LeeUuZ

♥ 11:44 AM